Not-mouse.

I was in bed, half asleep, and I heard this noise out in the hallway, like a squeaky rubber toy. "Eek eek!!"

Son had a friend here for a sleepover, so I assumed it was one of the kids. But it was past midnight, so I went out to shussh them.

Daughter`s room....silent except for breathing. Son`s room the same.

"Eek eek!!!"

I put on the hall light and there are our two 14 month old cats. And a very small grey furry thing.

"EEKKKK!!" (No, not me, the furry thing....)

Now, the cats do occasionally bring things in, but usually the things are dead. I poked the furry thing and realised it was trembling. (As any small furry thing would do, in the presence of two cats.) So I went for a jar or something....

....came back, it had gone. So had the cats. I went looking. Found Girl Cat (the brains of the outfit.) No furry thing. Found Boy Cat...on top of the dresser. With Furry Thing in mouth.

*Sigh.*

Up I climb (this is me in my nightie at 1am, you understand) with the jar and glare at Boy Cat. He glares back.....no contest, really. I take Furry Thing out his mouth and put it in the jar.

It`s a very small not-mouse, a vole I think, about an inch long. It is still trembling, but it is no longer making a sound.. It seems to have all its legs, tail, whiskers, head etc and there is no blood, so I shut the cats in a room and take it down to the garden, where I put the jar on its side in some long grass. Not-mouse will have to take it from here, I think to myself, and go into the house again. I shut the door out to the garden and the upper door into the hall, then take the collars off my two cats. Not going out again tonight, chaps! And then I go to bed.

"Yowwwllllrrrrrr..........yowwlleeeeee...."

They are sitting by the door, both of them, yowling to get out. To play. If they are fast, they imply, it will not escape again. Their toy.

Cats can be pretty horrible sometimes, no?